My boyfriend is Vanilla and it's killing my vibe?

Grace • 20. College Junior. In a relationship. Bicurious. Sexually active.
So I have like zero sex drive. Idk why. I hate it but I just don't. I used to be into kinky shit before my sex drive disappeared. My boy is pretty vanilla but he knows I'm into kinky shit so he tries to do it. He'll pull my hair or slap my ass, which I love, but I know he isn't into it which makes it so unsexy. 
Does anyone else find that their kinks only work if you're both into it? I feel bad because he is trying to make it good for me but it's just not working