How does one recover from the loss of a baby?

Brittany
Ever since April 12th I have been in and out of the er and doctors office for cramping and bleeding. The doctors told me it was normal. 
04/20/16 @6:30am: Got up like any other morning got ready for work, felt bad cramping but felt like it was everyday. I get to work and in a ton of pain and went to the mattress gallery (I work in a furniture store) to lay down and see if the pain would go away it didn't after laying there 20 minutes went to the bathroom feeling like I had to poop. I pushed out a quarter sized blood clot. I tried to go to the office to work, sat in the chair and felt like a bubble pop in my abdominal area not even a minute later I felt like I peed myself. Went back to the bathroom to find blood. I want to say anywhere from a cup to a cup and a half come out followed by a big blood clot. I called my friend at 08:15am while I drove to my doctors office. I get there and they rush me to a sonogram where it showed the IUD at an angle and the baby with a heartbeat of 122. Dr Pitt came in and said baby is coming and pulled the baby out and tried to clean all the placenta out. So my child was born into this earth at 09:04am and knowing that my child was alive and couldn't survive being in the outside world has completely broken me. Dr Pitt tried to get all the placenta and my iud out but was unsuccessful so she sent me to Brandon Regional Hospital to have a D and C performed. 
http://americanpregnancy.org/pregnancy-complications/d-and-c-procedure-after-miscarriage/
I was at Brandon regional and my surgery was at 130pm where they put me under to get the IUD and the rest of what was in there out. I woke up from surgery at about 330pm and brought down to my room. They said they could discharge me once I peed. I asked Dr Colalillo about my IUD being the reason for losing my child and she said it was in there sideways so there is a good chance it was. I got discharged from Brandon regional at 530pm to go home and realize all the emotions I have been bottling up inside. I can't stop crying because I'm emotionally broken, it hurts knowing that this all could have been prevented if someone took a urine sample in February before placing an IUD inside.
I am completely broken! I don't know how to move forward. I have a 5 month old who I know I need to be strong for but I am completely broken!