Baby drama

Hi I had baby six months ago and I didn't know till I was 33 weeks and her 4 weeks later and I got told I couldn't have kids and two I never wanted to have kids but now Since I had my bubba girl  I'm a bit jealous that all my friends got to experience  being pregnant  and now all I do is constantly thinking about having another one so I can see wat it like I know I got lucky with my little girl she is a easy baby I also don't want another one  due not being in a stable  relationship  has anyone got a hint on how I can get passed these feeling I've tried  to think about other stuff and I feel I'm starting to get reckless  with my decision lately