Extremely frustrated.

My due date is tomorrow, 3rd of May. Absolutely no signs of baby coming. I have lost little pieces of my mucus plug over the last two weeks, I've had diarrhoea for days on end but it all means absolutely nothing.

I've had a shit 9months of pregnancy. I have really had a rough time especially without my husband with me. I've had absolutely enough.

The pain and agony everyday is killing me. I have no patience left. I cannot even think about going overdue even though the reality is that I will most likely be overdue. I just want this baby out NOW and to feel normal again after a long 9months.

I am so fed up. So so so fed up. I can't do this anymore.

I cannot sleep. I have diarrhoea every fucking single day. I have really bad heartburn which keeps me up all night. I sit up in bed and cry my eyes out till my eyes get so heavy that I knock out, every night. I feel suffocated 75% of the time, like someone is strangling me and I can't breath. I can't sit. I can't lay. I can't stand. My vagina hurts like hell, worse than the first time I had sex. My bones ache. My feet are so swollen and painful. I have carpal tunnel syndrome so my hands are also swollen and aching.

Ugh. Please God, please save me. Please take me out of this agony. I am an FTM and I am so scared of giving birth but I am in so much agony and pain and misery that you know what, I'm excited for the pain to get started; how messed up is that?!?!?!?!?!