Creepy ex is creepy
My ex husband was very abusive to me the entire marriage but I still have to deal with him because we share custody of the kids. It's not a happy relationship, even now, since every time we have a dispute about something (like which extracurricular activities to put the kids in, for example) he kidnaps the kids until I give him what he wants. Literally, he takes the kids and goes out of town and holds them hostage there until I agree. We're constantly in court over it but thus far the judge just slaps his wrist and maintains joint custody. My point is, we do not have a friendly relationship. Our relationship is him being controlling and domineering like he was during the marriage and me trying to keep him at a distance and behaving in a legal manner.
I'm about to be induced with my first child with my second husband. This morning we were doing the first summer custody exchange and he came over to the car and said, the kids tell me you're having the baby this weekend. I'd love to come meet the baby when it's born. I was like....what? And he said, yeah, it's a big deal when we, I mean you, have a baby. And I was like, but why would you come see the baby? I didn't come see your kids with your new wife. And he was like, I just thought.....long pause....I could bring our kids so they could meet their new sibling.
Obviously I said no, the kids can wait 2 weeks till they come back to meet the sibling, but it was also really obvious that bringing the kids was a total afterthought for him. It's like he thinks on some level we're still together and he has some sort of right to be involved in my major life events. It feels like the controlling stuff he's done the entire time I've known him, like I'm never free of him, even delivering someone else's baby is something he has to be involved in. *shudder*
Meanwhile, my current husband was like, that's so sweet that he'd bring the kids by to meet the baby. Just....no.