Is this too much?

Question

I have a lot of friends and family who want to visit me and meet my son after he is born. I want to post this onto my facebook page so that people know what to expect. I'm worried that it is too much though or if I should add some more rules. 
THIS IS EXACTLY HOW I AM GOING TO POST IT please leave feed back

Call first. If you don't call you won't be allowed in my house. (You can always ask me for my number)

You will be asked to wash your hands and arms upon entry. And if you smoke you'll have to put on a shirt that I will provide.

If wanting to bring something for the baby please check with me first.

No more than 2 visitors are time. No one under 10.

My rules for my son are just that, rules. I have a reason for them. If you refuse to follow them. You will be asked to leave immediately.

Accepted Answer

Well, since you asked I'm answering. This is just outrageous, on so many levels, but I also think it's from a nasty cocktail of anxiety, fear of things out of your control, and simply being a FTM. I remember feeling like this when expecting my first baby, preparing all sorts of responses and rules for any situation. I felt justified because it was to keep my daughter safe, so I thought. I think most people would read this and say, "screw that, she's nuts and I'm not visiting." I think you will be very lonely and disappointed when no one wants to share in your joy and meet your baby. 
Newborns sleep, a LOT. Most people understand this and don't just "stop by". If this does happen, open the door with one boob out and just say "what!?"  They won't ever do that again. 
As far as the rest of the list, nahhhhh. None of it needs to be said and can be quietly addressed when people come. Have some tees for the smokers to wear over their clothes, you will NEVER have control over what people gift your child, make peace with that now and try to be open minded and relaxed. Deal with things as they come, instead of anticipating how you think you will feel, wait till the situation presents itself. The truth is, your life is about to be very different and having a baby is very isolating. Putting these kinds of barriers up between you and your support network will be detrimental.

Answer

If you're that worried about these things, I think it would be better to just say that you aren't receiving visitors for a few weeks. It doesn't come across super friendly, and you're probably going to get some comments about it that will upset you.

Answer

I think you could say it a little nicer.

Answer

I don't want to be overwhelmed with people either so Ive thought a lot about this. I think what you've said may come off as harsh and gain a lot of negativity that you don't need as you celebrate your new baby! I would put it as "We know many friends and family are patiently waiting the arrival of baby, however, Dad and I would appreciate limited visitors in the few weeks after bringing home baby so that we can have time to bond and adjust ourselves. Please call/text Dad or I first if you're thinking of dropping by." I plan on sending something similar out and I really hope my son is born on a weekday so family doesn't try to pile up to the hospital. I'm ok with them coming but I would rather then come all at once and leave all at once rather than trickle in all day long. My daughter was born on a Friday and it was nonstop all weekend. I thoroughly intend for that NOT to happen this time.

Answer

I agree with other poster. If you want to post anything, just say you won't be accepting visitors to the house until you are ready. Thank everyone for understanding. Or plan ahead and do a "sip and see" for 2 months in the future and say that you'd like everyone to meet baby at that point.

Answer

Eeeeek. Not sure you'll get any visitors after that, but that seems to be your intention 😂

Answer

I wouldn't visit or buy you anything if I was your friend or family and saw this. It's a nicer way to say these things and most people already know!! I've never had anyone just show up without calling after having a baby, nor not wash their hands. You also can't put stipulations on what people bring you. Just relax and wait a few weeks if you're going to be sounding this crazy!!

Answer

Wow. I get you want to keep your son healthy.. But my god are you over reacting.

I agree with calling first. 
That's about it.

Also if you are going to post that.. It sounds way rude. Try rephrasing it.

Answer

Honestly? I would be offended by this. I understand having boundaries. I'm a first time mom, and I also understand that it comes with a ton of anxiety. However, unless you have many people in your life that have zero boundaries, this isn't necessary. You shouldn't have to post anything. If you want to post something, I would make it cute like, 'Please call so that we can let you know if it's a good time for momma and baby. We are happy to provide numbers.' No one should scoff at washing their hands, but if someone is a heavy enough smoker for that to be a problem on their own clothes like that, a new shirt isn't going to help.

Answer

Woah........ Lol. Honestly, I think it's a lot too much. It sounds a little crazy, controlling, and ungrateful to those who are excited to share their love and support with you.

Maybe try sending a mass text & say "first and foremost, I appreciate everyone's love,  support, and willingness to come see me and baby. Please let me know BEFORE you plan on coming so I can let you know if it's a good time. I am nervous and have my own concerns. Love you all".

Is this too much?

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