I'm so hurt and I tried talking to him about it but he doesn't want anything to do with me right now. He said he isn't happy. When the past couple of days we just got our house loan approved and he got the car he wanted, he's been over the moon happy. Yet.. Tonight he drops this bomb.

It's not that he doesn't find me attractive physically, it's just everything else. He said our relationship is boring, which I kind of agree with, we need to explore more things. I tried talking to him about it but he just didn't want to hear it and laughed at me.

This all started tonight when I got upset at him going into his bubble (his laptop and earphones) when he said we were going to watch a movie and spend some quality time together. When I approached him and tried to talk to him about it after giving us some space, he said I've been weird all day and I admitted I'm just having some trouble dealing with some emotions. I admitted I have huge baby fever and I'm struggling to put it aside, he just turned it all around saying I still haven't gotten over my miscarriage which happened in October. I said I have moved on since my due date passed and I've made huge progresses, I don't break down anymore etc.. He just smiled mockingly at me and said "Do you want a medal?". I told him it's got nothing to do with my miscarriage and I've accepted my past baby loss and am just looking forward to more future babies. He just laughed at me and said "It wasn't even a baby, so get that out of your head. It wasn't even a fetus. It was just an embryo" That hurt so much... I just can't believe he said that. I was almost 12 weeks but baby died at 9. It tore me from the inside out, I cared so much for that little one and now that I've finally moved passed it he shoves this at me... I don't care what the scientific term was for it, to me it was a baby, MY baby.

I'm so lost. I want to drive somewhere but I don't know where. Its almost 12am, he's asleep and I'm just sitting here in bed next to him crying...