Is this relationship healthy?

So I have been in a relationship with this guy for 1 year and a little over 9 months. Now to set the stage a little better, I am 19 and he is 16 we are high school lovers. When we first went out everything was what you would expect in a relationship, the chocolate, the flowers, the dates... Ect. Well as the year went on we both fell into a lot of life issues, parents splitting, step parents, sibling rivalry and even death. This is where we are at now, we are in a secret relationship because his step mom doesn't like me and he lives in another city then me so he can live somewhere else, however, ever sense all this happened, both of us have gained some of our own issues, mine are things such as cronic depression and keep things to serious when it's suppose to be a joke. He has major abandonment issues and trust issues. Lately it's been to the point where I feel everything I do upsets him. Like when I hang with a group of friends or go on trips. He tells me I have to ask for everything I do. Now the hard part is we have been there for each other through everything. So question here to ask, am I in an unhealthy relationship, or should I try to help me and him through this and continue to go on?