Last night I let my daughter cry it out. Not because I believe in the cry it out method, or because I tried everything to soothe her and nothing worked, No. I let her cry it out because I just couldn't anymore. I couldn't be this 24/7 mother with no help. As she lay there crying, screaming, kicking, I cared but at the same time I didn't care. I am trying to keep from sinking into a deep depression, but I have no one to help me. My partner was my only family and he has left. Even when I've begged him, his family, and his friends to help me, they've refused; taken his side, believed his lies. My closest and only ally my mom passed away, I have a sibling whose taking me to court over the will, a partner who won't be a father and threatens to take me to court also, income slowly dwindling, and a  two month old baby. I would be lying if I didn't say sometimes I think of just shooting myself in the head but I worry who would take care of my child. I would never say this too a counselor because I won't risk someone taking my child from me. I didn't put this up here for help or solace because I truly know in this world you have no one but yourself. Everyone wants to help after its too late.I just needed to put it down in writing, I tried, I'm trying and if I keep failing so help me God, I really just need my mom.