I want him back 😒

I saw my ex yesterday,we've been broken up for over 4 years. I was young and dumb back then and took him for granted,all he did was school and work and me being the party girl i was that lifestyle wasn't good enough for me. So I cheated and then left him for an older man that I ended up marrying that marriage went down hill fast because he was a cheater himself.

My ex was with his wife and 2 kids they looked so cute together and my ex was soooo sexy 😍

Last night I thought about how it would have been if I had never left,how I should be the one with his 2 kids 😞

Now I want him back and if I see again hopefully by himself I'm gonna let him know how I feel and I hope he feel the same way because I wanna another chance

I know I sound crazy but my heart want him.

What should I do??

Edit I'm not a home wrecker I have someone also. You only live once why not try an be happy

I know he have a wife and I know he a good man and i also know he used to love me to death and I wanna know how he feels now.