Did I choose the right one?

Question

Do any of you feel that you chose the wrong partner? I'm worried I did, or even worse I'm just a terrible person. I'm always questioning it and feel alittle stuck. I feel like we have grown so different, we have hardly anything in common but our first little girl. I don't want to have to deal with a divorce. Our marriage isn't bad- he is a great person. We are just on different levels it feels like. 
Thoughts? Advise? 
No mean judgements please!

Answer

It sounds like maybe you two need to spend some time rediscovering each other. People always grow and change, usually at different rates. Go on dates, be romantic, find something new you can both do together. I personally think love and mariage are always something you'll have to work on, and that's not a bad thing. Complacency makes you stagnant.

Answer

I think that you need to remember the things that brought you together in the first place. I personally don't think that you should question whether you made the right choice at all, I think when you start doing that, I believe the wrong choice WAS made. I don't think you should have any doubt. However,  I don't think you should jump into a divorce either. I think your best bet is to talk things through, put everything on the table. Who knows he could be feeling the same way? I wish you all the luck that what's meant to be will happen :)

Answer

Try to find an activity to do together just the two of you at least once a week. Sometimes doing that will spark more conversation and I'll have more in common to start with.

Answer

Maybe some counseling will help? Whether it is to fix your marriage or help you figure out if you're happy or not

Answer

How long has it been that way? You are both people and will be experiencing your own growth at different pages at times... Its impossible to constantly be in sync with another person. Sometimes you will feel more connected than others, you just have to communicate and work through the less connected times.

Answer

That is my biggest fear that it will happen one day

Answer

If you have a great relationship I would talk to him! The longer you dwell on the thought that he isn't the right one the more it will Become a reality.

Answer

It doesn't make you a bad person!  How long have you been married? I don't think anyone will go through their marriage and never have some "off" moments where you just don't feel in sync.  I think you just need to figure out for yourself what exactly it is that's making you feel on a different level from him- and ask yourself if it is fixable.  Then, communication is key.  Is there something you need from him that you aren't getting? Is there something he needs from you that you aren't providing?  Maybe it isn't fixable, and that's OK too.  Just don't forget that you must have been "on the same level" at some point- so now you just have to figure out what changed.  Good luck!!

Did I choose the right one?

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