I know I'm a shitty person. I never believed in a million years I would be that girl but yet here I am. I'm recently divorced after a long marriage. Was always faithful and never believed in excuses to why people cheat. During this process of my divorce I met a man online he's much older than I am by 12 years. He has no kids and has been married for a few years. We started chatting online & became good online friends. He has been there for me emotionally from the start. As time went on we started getting intense chemistry for each other. I've never ever felt this way for another man before. We talk on the phone often, chat everyday and just the sound of his voice turns me on. We have phone sex several times a week. Nothing physical has happened yet because he lives across the country and although he has business trips where I live every so many months I wasn't ready to take that next step. I want him and crave him like I've never craved anyone before him. I absolutely hate being in this position. Every time I try and stop what we have I start getting very bad anxiety and I end up reaching out to him. I know what I'm doing is terrible I hate that I'm doing this to his wife. We been talking for almost a year now and we've planned to make things physical very soon. My body and heart crave him but my head is telling me differently. I want this to end but I can't seem to stop. I have no one since my divorce I know it some sort of way I use him as well because I'm extremely lonely. My ex made me a very insecure person and this guy has slowly made me more secure about myself. I've never felt this confident in my life and it's all thanks to him. How can I stop this before it's too late?? How do I stop myself from getting anxiety when I try and move on? I don't want to be that girl, the homewreaker the girl that ruined a marriage. I want out I do but I can't seem to stop. Any advice is appreciated!