When i was younger my dad would always yell at me and my mom and sister. One night the anxiety got to me, i had a knife on the sink. A friend facetimed me and my camera changed to the normal side (not selfie mode). He saw the knife and told my dad and my dad went balistic. I sat the knife on the kitchen table after he was done yelling at me he threw the knife at me. It was closed but could have opened. I was crying and my mom said to him "thats it!!!!". Two years later they got a divorce. I live with my mom and sister. He once pushed me against the wall and tried to hit me. I reacted in self defense. I pushed him off of me and then he went after my mom. I lost it. I pulled him off of her and punched him. I felt so guilty of punching my father. He said sorry so many times for being mean to me but kept doing it. Now he says it and idek what to believe. This was all a few years ago. Im getting bad flashbacks and nightmares. I had a flashback yesterday in english class. I just started breathing heavily. Crying. Heart racing. Last night i had a nightmare of the knife opening. Could this be minor ptsd or just anxiety.?? I need to find an answer