Terrible mom

This is basically me venting. All week I'm alone with the kids (a 2 year old& 1 month old) I do my best to create memories and laughs they'll remember. Today I lost my poop as my toddler was throwing a fit and as I changed her diaper she kicked the wind out of me I spanked her and her dad instantly made me feel like the worst person ever which I was already feeling like. I'm now crying in bed because I feel like the worst mom ever