Got on FB after work and first thing I saw was that my cousin made a pregnancy announcement. So now there are 4 pregnancies in our family. I can honestly only be genuinely happy for my husband's cousin and my stepsister in-law. The other 2 (my cousin and husband's brother's girlfriend) already have 3 kids and they are ridiculously young, like 21 and 24. Neither are very stable. My cousin got divorced a year or so ago (she had a shotgun wedding when she was 18 because she was pregnant). She's been with several short-term boyfriends since then and I know she struggles to support the ones she has. Husband's brother's girlfriend is just...ridiculous. I have no other words to describe it. She hasn't ever worked for a long period of time. She always comes up with an excuse to quit. Her and my husband's brother have a horrible relationship. On again and off again. They don't live together. Both live with their own parents. Both steal. She KNEW she was probably pregnant this time around and didn't even go to a doctor until she was already 14-16 weeks along, so she absolutely doesn't take care of herself while pregnant.

Like I said, the other 2 don't bother me. It hurts, but I'm happy for them. They are wonderful women. One is already a wonderful mom and I know the other will be as well. But these 2 just...it just makes me so angry and jealous. I miscarried in August and have been told "It just wasn't meant to be." So my husband and I who are in a solid and stable relationship, I have an established career and my husband will graduate from medical school in 2 months, did everything right as far as the pregnancy was concerned were not meant to have my child? But these immature girls are meant to be blessed with a 4th??? I don't get it. I know I shouldn't feel this way and should still be happy for them. But I'm not.