honest advice and help please

Kayhlin
Been married for three years, our relationship is solid. Other than the physical... he used to want to make out, mess around, have sex quite a lot and now? He never initiates, hardly is sexual to me in anyway, and we have sex maybe once a month. I've tried talking to him about it, he says sex is messy and feels like a chore. I've tried to make it more pleasurable for him and less like a chore... but it doesn't seem to be working. My only conclusion is I'm the problem? Please, keep in mind that I have anxiety...
Anyone else going or gone through this that could offer some advice?  Really struggling here...