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I could really use some advice

Rebecca • Tue, Nov 01 • We have 2 angel babies and 3 babies this side of heaven and pregnant with our 4th!

We have been trying to conceive for 2 years. September 6 I found out our third IUI worked and I was pregnant (1 day shy of it actually being 2 years). A week after blood work confirmed I was pregnant the follow up blood work showed I was miscarrying. It broke me and even worse, it broke my husband. Infertility has left me feeling so broken and alienated from my friends. I would've been number 7 pregnant in our circle of friends. I have really struggled with having infertility and being around friends who have kids but now it's worse. I just found out that 2 of my good friends feel as though I am pushing them away. One has endometriosis and has a miracle baby the other is pregnant with her 3rd and it's been relatively easy for them. I've never not confided in them, but they both feel as though I'm different. I'm not the same "vibrant and fun" person as I use to be, and the one feels that because it's hard for me to be around people who are pregnant or have kids that I'm not dealing with it in a healthy way.

It hurts to be told that and it's hard to know they feel pushed away. I honestly don't know how I've done so though. We still talk and hang out. I keep them in the loop and I love on their kids but I'm still "distant" and "not the same."

I know I'm not the same person I use to be. This journey of infertility has changed me. I dont know how it wouldn't.

Has anyone else felt this way? I could really use some advice.

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