first time having sex after my daughter's stillbirth.

The first few weeks I wasnt even able to look at him because I felt so bad I didnt even see him the first days because I just completely lost my shit. He was very patient and very strong because he just kept doing what I did before he didnt let our kids know how bad the situation was that we were in. He stopped working for a while and looked after our 1 and 5 year old while I was in my room just a total mess not doing ANYTHING for weeks.

I didnt talk to anyone I didnt go out I barely ate and all I did was cry. So I somehow had to get over it and he made me get over it my sending my kids in my room and I got diatracted. After he made sure I was able to take care of them he went back to work and had to work a whole lot more then he did before because he also needed a distraction and had so much work to do.

I distanced myself from him and made him feel bad I know it's unfair bur we kinda worked it out and we're normal now but I didnt feel ready yet to have sex.

Before we had our 1 year old we had sex like multiple times a day and he's a needy man so months without having sex is hard for him

I think I want to get back to normal now and first thing I could do would be giving him what he needs I think

I just dont know how and what I feel awful and I look awful just like a skeleton and I hate it I dont know if anyone has been through the same or has any suggestions just let me know please.