Stretch marks and feeling so insecure 😢

I'm feeling so insecure about my 30 week pregnant body tonight. I haven't gained much weight and I'm proud of myself, but the weight I gained in the beginning left me with terrible stretch marks on my butt/lower back and some on my thighs. They're all purple and there's nothing I can do to get rid of them. No lotion or oil will take away marks that are already there. I feel nothing but disgust towards them since they're just the result of me gaining weight too quickly when I got pregnant. They will fade a little after pregnancy but they will always be there...

I'm starting to get some smaller marks on my belly too, but I feel differently about them. I moisturize the skin on my belly all the time and drink a lot of water and I'm still getting them, so it's just meant to happen. They are also the result of our little girl growing in my tummy and that makes me appreciate them more. Not all women get to experience this. I feel like I will start feeling even better about them when our little one is born and there's a living proof of what my body was capable of creating.

But the marks on my butt and back... They're just horrible. My SO offered to give me a full-body massage tonight but I'm feeling hesitant because I don't want him to see how stretched and ugly my skin is. I'm afraid that at some point he'll get fed up with looking at my purple-striped body and find himself a pretty girl with clear skin. Ridiculous, I know, he's never been anything but faithful and loving and he doesn't really seem to care about the marks at all... Maybe it's just the pregnancy hormones. But I just feel so insecure tonight and it's killing me 😢 the only comfort is feeling my little girl's kicks and wiggles and knowing that sooner or later we will meet her ❤