Am I being a bitch?

Question

Okay, so. I am 35 weeks pregnant with a little boy. There are two possible fathers. One is a mere .1% chance, we did Plan B the morning after as we woke up to realize we'd made a terrible drunken mistake. 
A week later, I, overly trusting, slept with a guy whom I thought was going to turn out to be a great relationship. 
I found out a few weeks into it that I was pregnant. 
I immediately told my boyfriend that there was a slight possibility that I'd concieved before I got with him & that the baby might not be his, but more than likely is. He was fine with it. He thought the baby was his but wanted an abortion. 
I, however, did not. He left me. Kicked me out of his house & after that, the only speaking we did was fighting except for one time. The ultrasound. I was 11 weeks along. He didn't understand, I guess, how quickly a baby develops. He walked out of the room saying, "That's not my baby."

After that I decided to contact my friend (the guy I'd slept with first.) he said he'd want an abortion too, if it were his. He'd pay for it & everything.
Again. I didn't want that. I'd miscarried a year ago. 
I felt like both of them wanted to strip me of my motherhood & baby I'd FINALLY been given. I was so angry with them. How could neither of these "men" love my baby? Our baby?

Now, I'm hearing through the grapevine that the ex would pay for a DNA test & if it's his, he'd pay child support as long as he gets joint custody but he hasn't told ME directly. I honestly feel like if he doesn't have the balls to come to me about it, he doesn't deserve it. He left me when I needed him the most. They both did. I don't think they deserve to even be near my child.

I just want to move away with my son & my boyfriend (who has been far more of a father than either of them ever where to a child that isn't even his.) to a beautiful home. I wouldn't lie to my son & say that my boyfriend is his father. He can call him Dad, but if he wants to know his biological father when he's able to tell me that, yes. I would do it. I'd get the DNA test.

I'm partially venting & also partially wanting advice. Do I let the ex get a DNA test so I can get child support from that asshole & just deal with a possible custody battle when I don't think he deserves it?

The way I see it, they both wanted my son dead. They should act like he is & not speak to me.

Answer

It seems like you barely knew either of the potential fathers and were not in any kind of serious or committed relationship. So in all fairness I can not blame either of them for not being thrilled and not wanting the baby. Men rarely bond with an unborn child, it's not the same for them. The baby isn't growing in them so they don't have the same feelings. And many men don't want to have a tie to a woman they are not in a relationship with. 
If anything the baby deserves to know who their biological father is so I would say yes for the baby's sake get a DNA test after birth and confirm parentage.

Answer

He can get a court order for a DNA test. If he's the father you're tied to him for the rest of your child's life whether you like it or not.

Answer

Even though that baby is growing inside of you, that baby isn't your 'property'. That child will grow into a man one day and he deserves the opportunity to know who his real father is and decide if he wants him around when he's old enough. But that baby is 50% its father and the father deserves to have the chance to be a man and take care of his responsibilities. Love your child more than you hate your ex.

Answer

I can understand how you feel.

However, it sounds like these were not long term relationships, you have to see why these men were upset.

Do the DNA and give the father a chance to be a father, then go from there.

Answer

If he wants a dna test and is willing to be apart of his childs life then dont be bitter allow that bond put your feelings aside its not about you its about child and father relationship

Answer

Don't lie to your son, that will come back to bite you in the ass.  I don't think what either man did was right. However, when people are scared they say things they might not mean. Wait and let him come to you and if he does give him a DNA test. If he doesn't come to you then go about your life with your new bf but do tell your son when he is old enough to comprehend

Answer

Girl tbh you can't do much until he says something to you directly.  And when he does get child support! No you not bring a bitch you're being a grown ass woman.

Answer

if you don't need the child support. cut them out of your life and be happy with your child and boyfriend.. 💖

Answer

All this drama isn't giving you a chance to enjoy your pregnancy or make plans for a new baby. Why not ignore both of their bad attitudes and concentrate on looking after yourself and your unborn baby? When the baby is born organise a test yourself then you are in control of the situation - neither one sounds in a position to be calling the joint custody card so don't worry about that. Whoever is the dad can start out by showing he is worthy of time with his son to the courts.  
They both sound useless articles.

Answer

You should get the dna test because you might would need to know family medical history in your son's future.  Also if they told you about getting abortion in text, make sure you save it. Most court system are pro mom and dad usually just gets every other weekend unless one can prove the other unfit.  Most court systems still like to give each parent a chance.  The father may not even come around to take the visitation he was given.  On the other hand once he sees the baby he might change his whole outlook and regret telling you to get an abortion.  If your current bf is stepping up and will be there then your son will always have a daddy no matter what.

Am I being a bitch?

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