please help im in a rut and dont know what i should do

Kenzie
Mini background on me and my boyfriend (both 17 and this relationships also a secret bc my parents are uber freaks about everyone just being an online creep so I cant turn to someone like my own mom) we're ldr,for two years and 5 going on 6 months, He wanted to get more intimate and I consented and this has been going on for a little while anyways now heres the deal
 He wants 🐱 pics but im self conscious and do not like how it looks and is colored and my inner thighs bc theyre also hella chubby (I understand not every girl has a tiny cute same fleshed color porn star 🐱) anyways I wont show him one for that reason and two because he treats me imo like a girl you'd get all this pics from in a fling and she has to show a 🐱 pic to make it worth a pic of his 🍆) and its just ridiculous, I want to stop being shy and get to that level with him but I don't like feeling like thats what I have to do 24/7 to get something back from him.. I just need advice and opinions in general because I'm lost and I feel like I need help.