unattached and depressed

Please no judgement, I already feel terrible. But my DD is in 2 weeks and I feel no connection with my baby, I've been hoping the farther along I got and the closer birth came that I would be joyful and excited but I'm not, I feel like I cannot see myself as a mother and i don't want this anymore but I can't do anything. I don't know if I'm just scared or what but it's making me so depressed I don't want to be here. I know, I'm already being a horrible mom but I just can't fathom I'm about to have a baby and I don't know what to do, I feel so low. 

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