First pregnancy loss

I recently lost my first pregnancy. And I thought I was ok with it at first because I miscarried one egg and the other egg got stuck and my tubes (which we didn't find out until a couple weeks after the miscarriage). It was very rough because my hcg levels kept going up and they couldn't figure out why. And I told myself that it was alright because things would have turned out badly anyway because of the tubal on top of the miscarriage. But I just found out one of my really close friends wife is pregnant and she's due around the time I would have been. And all these shows on tv keep having episodes come up about miscarriage. And I've been so angry lately it's weird. I'll be fine and happy all day at work and then I come home and I'm just angry and want to cry constantly. I wish it would just get easier already. We're fixing to start another fertility treatment next week, I hope it will help more then it will hurt.