Does this sound okay for an annoucment?

So I'm not 100% sure but I think I'm pregnant and have low hcg levels because my period is 3 days late, the first day I was late I threw up In the morning and couldn't eat all day felt so queezy didn't eat til 9 that night, my nipples and areoles are noticbly darker, I thought they looked a tint darker a few days ago but today I KNOW they are darker, my nipples and breast are sensitive but don't "hurt", and have sharp pains thew them, I had light fluttery cramps by my right ovary yesterday for about 15 minutes , I barley have an appetite all I ate today is a corn dog, all day. And the last 2 days barley ate a thing, have a head aches, hot flashes at night even with my fan going full blast and have lots of white and watery cm, which I never get THIS before AF. Or any of these symptoms before AF the only thing I get is very very painful cramps a day before haven't had that at all,  Now that being said I'm only guessing, I tested the first day of my missed period with a walmart equate test bfn, then today I tested with first response still bfn, so I'm a little confused but I know that a lot of women didn't get there BFP til a week of being late so I'm going to try to hold off testing til Tuesday. We used OPks this month, successfully, and I really just don't think it's a cawincidence that the month we use them my period is late and feeling this way,  I'm always always on time. 31 days exactly. Anyways my question is if I end up getting my BFP, I'm planning to sneak my friend in the house while my SO is gone and have her hide in the closet and record us im gonna tape a piece of paper to my tummy and take the test to it and it's gonna sAy your gonna be a daddy! I'm gonna tell him I want him to look at something on my stomach and when he raises my shirt up I'm gonna have my friend recording his reaction! :) What do yall think of this ? IF I get my bfp. Has any other women done this? How did he react? Thank you :))) baby dust to all