Wow THIS would happen to me

So i went to see him and it was really awkward and i had to get back to work. then i went to see him again to talk to him a little bit more cause it was SO damn awkward and he said sorry cause i caught him off guard 😂.  But like we freaking INSTANTLY hit it off.  I was ditching work for like an hour just to talk to him and I was just so interested in him. 

I don't ever really like anyone ever but talking to him made my head spin. He was so perfect and like a well established man and older than me and just PERFECT and everything i'm looking for. 

We exchanged snaps or whatever and i have him my number because i was interested and i thought he was too. He told me that he had a boat and that he would go fishing near here so i said "omg we should go i haven't gone in a long time" and he said that we should and it would be fun. So i left blah blah

But anyways like these last couple of days i kept thinking about him and how like perfect he'd be for me. So since he hadn't messaged me i decided to message him on snapchat yesterday and told him i wanted to send him a stupid funny vday card that i thought he'd like (because of what we talk about the other night). And he said his "girl wouldn't like that" and i was like ..... AND HE SAID HE WAS FUCKING MARRIED. 

like it's fine and all and i respect that but WHY does this have to happen to me. I was so sad yesterday and today because i was just like kind of picturing us together and he's already damn married. He said we could be friends and i'm completely fine with that and respect his wishes obviously. But i'm just so heartbroken right now cause i saw something in him that i haven't seen in any other guy out there. And i know there's sooo many other guys in the world it just sucks 😭😭😭