SOS: sexual with partner

Hey guys I need some help. I'm sexually active (like blowjobs and stuff) but I usually give him bj and in return he usually just rubs me.. I am nervous about letting him finger me Bc sometimes I am turned on big I'm still scared I won't be "wet enough" or I won't orgasm. I haven't orgasmed before. Also he told me he though my all vags were gross so I'm very self conscious. Any tips for me to get more comfortable? Also bj tips? And i don't know sometimes I'm just not into what he's doing but I want to be, I just can't.. Any help?