I can never catch a break
I was so happy when found out I was pregnant. As a woman, you want nothing more than to be a momma. My 8 week ultrasound was great, we saw heartbeat and got an exact due date, then on a 10 week ultrasound, our world came crashing down. We were told our sweet baby did not have a heartbeat anymore, and after a second confirmation ultrasound, I opted for a d&c.
I've had the d&c and now, two days later, I am admitted to the hospital because my uterus is retaining blood, and it's expanding. The cramps I'm having are unbearable, and I'm getting iv dilaudid every 2 hours for pain.
I feel like my world is collapsing. On top of that, my boyfriend and I have been at each other's throats since we found out about the miscarriage, and although he was with me at the d&c...I am currently laying in the hospital, by myself.
I feel like dying. Every bit of happiness was taken away from me, and now my body is acting up. It's so hard being here, seeing all the pregnant ladies going into labor, hearing the hospital play the little song every time a baby is born...I'm losing my mind.
I don't know how I'm going to get through this, especially alone. By boyfriend was the one piece of the baby I still had, he was supposed to be my rock, and he isn't here to hold my hand.
I can't do this, ladies. I really can't.
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