friend and possible rape?

Question

so my friend has been married almost 2 years been witht he man for 3 years and they just had their 2nd daughter 3 months ago.. well one night while relaxing my friend drank 3 drinks of vodka one was a double so basicially 2... anyways she didnt eat before hand and wound up getting sick in the bathroom however she blacked out and didnt remember the next 30mins... she remembers everything up until puking and then the 30 mins after but not anything else however she supposably showered and had sex with her man in the bathroom... her baby was around 3 weeks old and she realizes that she should ha e ate before hand.. and the baby was well taken care of .. her husband had one beer after a 12 hr shift... he told her the next day when she woke up sore that they had sex and since then she hasnt been the same... she avoids sex just says no.. what do you think

Answer

Ok, so technically she didn't consent. So it could be considered rape. Spousal rape is a real thing. Personally, my husband has my blanket consent. He can wake me up with sex during the night. He can have drunk sex with me... its all fine and good and he knows it. She needs to communicate with her spouse. It sounds as if he thought he had the green light and she doesn't agree. Why can't they just discuss this like adults?

Answer

No, I would not consider that rape. It sounds like they need to sit down & talk about this & set some ground rules though.

Answer

I don't know if it's rape, far too gray for me. I do think they need to talk about it though. A resolution must be sought out or things will go badly. Her concerns should be expressed openly. Hope everything works out for them.

Answer

How is this rape? She didn't say no first off and secondly they BOTH had a drink so BOTH legally could not consent.

Answer

This is a gray area. 3 weeks after a baby, you would think he would have refused in order to keep her healthy. However, many men aren't very informed on this subject. If she were asking for it and telling him it was fine (and he may have thought she was a regular level of drunk that has been fun in their relationship in the past), I can see why he would consent.

I'm not sure I'd define this as rape, but I think it could be if she were clearly super hammered and wasn't into the sex.

Answer

This video explains consent in an interesting way...

https://youtu.be/oQbei5JGiT8

Answer

If she was that inebriated, he definitely knew he was taking advantage of her. Js.

Answer

well from what i know is that he knew she wanted to wait til the 6 weeks to get cleared... he had one beer hours earlier so he was completely sober cuz hewas taking care of the baby while mom unwinded.. she downed her first drink around 7 and by 830 was puking she told me she kept apologizing for getting sick she had no idea they even had sex and when shewas told she did she flipped out .. he said he figured it would b ok since he used to in the past get lucky when she drank.. and she said not when you knew i wanted to wait just because i drink dont mean your gonna get lucky but he didnt get it.. so ever since anytime they have had sex she feels gross and slowly is finding him undesirable... she says they havnt had sex in over a month and he has been gettn mad at her... i feel if she didnt say yes and hewas sober  it was rape especially he knew she was going to wait til a dr cleared her.. this is the first time he ever did this.. he never did this when they had their first

friend and possible rape?

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