Spare me the judgment, please? Thanks

Question

I'm 16 weeks pregnant with my first child and I  feel like I should already be in love and I'm not nor do I feel feel any type of connection between the baby and I.  I don't feel anything! Anything at all and I feel bad. I never refer to the baby as "my baby" it's always the baby or this baby, the kid or the fetus. I should be happy, right? This is where the non judgment come in. I've literally cried everyday since finding out I was pregnant not only that but I've prayed and wished and hoped that the kid would just disappear. I've even thought about forcing a miscarriage and I know it's terrible because there are people who do anything to be where I am. Is there something wrong with with me? Why do I feel this way?

Answer

I'm sorry you're feeling this way. Its normal not to bond with the baby right away. But if you feel like you dont want this pregnancy to happen, maybe talk to your doctor or psychologist about it? They could help you see if you're genuinely rejecting the pregnancy or if you're having pregnancy depression. Either way, go get some help! It is possible for you to feel better.

Answer

I'd talk to your doctor or a therapist/counselor. You need to find out if this is just depression or if you really just aren't ready to be a mother. There is no shame in adoption, it's a brave thing to do. But until you figure some things out take care of yourself and the baby..no matter your final decision, in the end you'll want to look back knowing you did your best to give him/her a healthy start.

Answer

Maybe you should consider adoption. YOUR baby deserves a family that will cherish and love them the whole way through. Many families would love to have a baby. I'm not saying this in a bad way but the best thing you can do is put the baby first with this decision. If you don't think you can do this now it's going to be harder when your baby is here. Please consider that.

Answer

Felt this exact same way with this current pregnancy. I was miserable and overwhelmed and I could NOT connect or accept I was pregnant and it felt surreal and confusing. 
Just about to be 26 weeks now and doing way better and feeling normal and pretty content. Went to therapy for quite a few months and got a lot of help to sort out what I wanted and deal with what I felt. I recommend it.

Answer

Why didn't you get an abortion early? Just out of curioisity?
I think it's normal to feel this way because your feelings are probably biased by your age or biased by your future endeavours you had for yourself?
My advice is to appreciate it because I've seen so many woman crying out of devastation to be pregnant and how blessed we are to be able to conceive... you can still achieve a lot in your life with your child

Answer

I am so sorry that you are going through this!... I can't imagine how hard this must be for you... I suggest speaking to someone, a perfessional. They might be able to help and I hope that for you and your baby that they can!.. I wish you luck!

Answer

That's tough... a lot of moms go through depression during and after pregnancy. Have you seen ultrasounds or felt it move yet? Maybe you'll feel differently a little later down the road. Have you thought about putting the baby up for adoption?

Spare me the judgment, please? Thanks

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