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scared about TTC
My husband and I have been together for 16 years now (got married last September) and have never talked about babies until recently. We are thinking of TTC this summer. He is happy about it and apparently hasnt suggested it before (I brought it up last Christmas as a possibility) because he said that while wanting a child of our own, the decision is mine since I will be the one carrying it. I have been vocally against having children so far not because I dont like them, I just didnt feel ready and convinced it would fit my personality to be a mom.
The idea is that while thea idea of us having a baby is quite exciting and I do love my husband tremendously, I am also scared of ttc. first of all, the idea of putting pressure on us is really putting me ofd (having sex on specific days, knowing it has a purpose rather than just celebrating our love for each other). Second of all, pregnancy is scary shit- especially late term and birth. Third, and as selfish as it sounds,...I love our relationship the way it is- we are independent people, used to doing many things just the two of us- we are both avid climbers and snowboarders, used to taking off when we want. My husband feels that having a baby will not impair that much (we are getting a van in order to travel as much as possible) but I am scared that my dislike for having others mess with our dynamic will sort of impact the baby.
I am actually happy about turning into a family and not just being a couple but Im also overwhellmed by the reaponsibility a baby brings. A good friend of mine that has recently had a baby has told me that she and her husband are much stronger couple than before now post baby and I can understand why- but they are completely different to us.
Maybe I am just too used to being the two if us after 16 whole years of a great life and relationship... its really scary to have such conflicting feelings- something between joy and excitement and anxiety.... please tell me I am not the only one!