Can We Get Back Together???

Question

Hello ladies! I need some much needed advice, anything would help me! I appreciate you reading my sob story...
So last Monday was me and my now ex-boyfriends 4 month anniversary, and late Monday night we decided to go on break. Why do you ask? He told me he felt unhappy, not like himself, and he needed some time alone. At first the thought scared me because I thought it would lead up to a scary and heartbreaking breakup, but I learned breaks are healthy. We didn't have set in stone rules for this break, because we both thought we were still together but not at the same time. That made me unhappy, so it was just a mess and it didn't make things better. So late last night (Sunday) we decide to end our relationship and be friends. He told me he needed me as a friend for long term, and that he just wasn't looking for a relationship right now because he was so unhappy.

I have hope we can still be together. Our story is a one of fate, and I have a belief fate only works once for everyone. I do love him and I see us together in our future. I am happy with him, and I care for him so much. He's at a point in his life where he's unhappy and he can't even love himself. He said he has an intention of getting back together, but I'm afraid we'll get distant and fall out. I also don't want to be his friend if he begins talking to someone else, because of my strong feelings for him. Is that right of me? Even though he reassures me with his good intentions and he still only talks to me and hangs out with me, I'm still scared of that. I believe in him, but I'm scared.

We both are Christian, and we've done a lot of firsts together. (I know scandalous🙄) We're so involved in each other's lives, I don't want to throw it away, all the memories and experiences. We go to church together, and when I say the whole church is his family, literally the whole church is his family. Everyone will know and I think it'll be awkward. 😭

I really need some input please. I literally have no one to talk to about this, my best friend is in the most toxic relationship ever, she gives advice and it's hypocritical. My best friend is now my ex boyfriend so it's a mess. Thanks 💕💋

Answer

He doesn't want to be with you. Accept that now and move on, you will be happier for it.

Answer

I think you can stay friends with him if you want, but you can't let him string you along. If it's friends, draw the line there. Don't be his friend with benefits, or hold out and save yourself for him. You won't be happy that way, and you can get hurt if he decides to see someone else. So be friends with him, fine… But also move on and try to find someone who actually wants to commit to you. Don't put all of your eggs in one basket, especially with someone who is on the fence about it. You deserve to have somebody fully on board. You deserve to be fully loved. Even Christians can say one thing and do another, so don't ever think that he's not talking to other people. If he doesn't want to be exclusive with you, he has every right to be talking to other people and dating other people. So do you. And what you said about fate… Sometimes people are meant to be in your life, but only for a short time to teach you something and then they go. So your fate with him may not actually be to be with him romantically, but to have him in your life to teach you an important valuable lesson... in this case, your lesson might be how to let go... or how to not settle for less than you deserve.

Answer

Get out and don't look back. I was in a relationship like that when I was 18. I wasted a year and a half of my life. 6 months later he married a girl he dated one of our breaks.

Answer

He doesn't know what he wants? It's either he wants you or he doesn't, it's as simple as that.
In a relationship you don't get to pick and choose when you're together, you work through the good and the bad.
I'm going to be brutally honest with you, I don't think hes 100% committed to you, that sucks to hear but I'm sorry. I believe it's just an excuse to end it, a childish one at that. Maybe he can't bring himself to say why he truly wants to end it, maybe he has feelings for someone else. You should just move on with your life and forget about boys for now, go enjoy time with friends, it will allow you to keep him of your mind. Who knows what the future holds, for now though you're better off to walk away.

Answer

It is up to you to decide what you want! But if you ask my honest opinion I will move on from this sort of relationship and focus on my life! It's clear that he wants to hangout for his convenience! I think if he needs space hi him as much as he needs and let him know you're not an option! The real question is what is he unhappy about? Is it you? Or if he says he is unhappy with himself perhaps it's better you let go and let him decide what he wants without affecting you! Why should you affect your life and emotions over his uncertainty? Chances are he is interested in something else and you might end up getting hurt! But it's entirely up to you and you know your relationship better! But personally if someone asks me for space despite my commitment I suggest them to join NASA ! Hopefully you know what you are dealing with! Take care

Can We Get Back Together???

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