bridesmaids
Sooo I need opinions please be nice!
It all started once I got engaged!
First let me start by describing to you my personality I'm easy going and a complete dork so I tend to make a lot of girlfriends with that being said. Picking my bridesmaids has been torture!! I have a handful of friends I've know since elementary (kindergarten to be exact) but out of that handful I'm only picking one of them to be in my wedding. I've know her the least out of all them (5th grade).
Anyways my bf purposes to me at my birthday party. (You'll understand later why I added that) so one of my friends that I've known since kindergarten wasn't able to make that party and she wanted to set up a lunch to celebrate my bday and the engagement. (We will call her Cindy) so Cindy and I go to lunch and she brings up the topic of being a bridesmaid. So I told her straight out the truth! Which now I regret but it was awkward! I told her that I love her and she means a lot to me but we live an hour and half away from each other and didn't think it would be a great idea since I would need people who could be there to be in it. I also mentioned how she still hadn't meet by bf of three years and I really wanted to pick people that meant a lot to not just me but also our relationship (which means that they have had a part in growing us or giving relationship advice and have been team us from the beginning) not only that but my future groom doesn't have many guy friends so I wouldn't be able to pick all my girls. Cindy response was awesome and more than what I expected. She told me that she was sad that she wasn't gonna be able to be apart of it but she understood and still was very happy for me and couldn't wait for that day to celebrate. Soo I thought ok awesome she understand we can move forward. So fast forward four months later to her birthday. She invites me to celebrate a week before the shindig. I told her I couldn't go cus my car had broken down. I lagged on txting her back which I have a tendacy of doing that but I explained that I've been super busy cus I'm helping my move out of the country at the moment!! Any who she txt me back she understand and thi long txt about how hard it must be. I didn't txt back cus like I said I was really busy. Anywho the day of her birthday I txt her saying how much I appreciate our friendship and how long we've been friends that I love her she writes back that she really appreciate our friendship as well and that she considers me family. I don't txt back cus I get side tracked with the fact that my bf is going out the state for a bout two weeks. So come yesterday I check this app that I have that tells me who unfollows or blocks me on instagram. To my surprise I see that she blocked me!! So I txt her why she blocked me. She responds that she told her everything and that her mom said that after all these years I've Never been there for her and that I haven't been going to her functions and she said that I was upset and telling her that I didn't want her part of the wedding even after she paid for my lunch! That were not kids anymore and I don't know the first thing about being a good friend. 😢 so I responded with were not kids anymore and we are busy and we shouldn't hold against each other if we can't attend functions especially since we live far away from each other. Basically i tried to make my peal and say she's right I don't make an effort but it works both ways. And I'm sorry but she shouldn't end a 25 year old friendship over that. Anywho she responded by saying I'm a bad friend and that she finally sees taht and doesn't want a relationship with anymore. I ended it with telling her that I'm sorry and that I do love her and she will always have a place in heart if she ever wanted it. So with that being said and sorry for the long story!!! I don't know wat to do about future not being bridesmaids do I tell them before or do I just let it be?? Wat about her do I try even more to try to fix it? Even though she made it clear she wants nothing to do with me? I feel like shit!!! It's 1:30 in the morning and I can't sleep. I feel like the worst friend ever I was even at a point to apologize to everyone on facebook if I ever neglected our relationship I feel sorry. I need advice nd guidance. So if you manger to read this whole story THANK You!
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