infidelity and insecurity

Last year my husband and I split up. First time in nearly 10 Years of being together that we split. It lasted only 1 month. During that time he was sleeping with someone. I didn't find out about it until after we got back together. As that it approaches a year since this happened.... I'm having a really hard time not punching him in the face. For a lack of better words. Every day this week i have felt so sad. Ugly. Insecure. I'm having a hard time looking at him. Talking to him. Sleeping beside him. I'm sure a lot of you will say that if I chose to forgive him and be with him that I have to just accept it. And to that I say fuck that. I will never forgive him. I will never forget. Some days it's just easier than others to push it down deep.  I guess the only reason I'm even writing this is in an attempt to keep myself from saying something to him. I'm heartbroken all over again as if it just happened yesterday. I'm looking for a tip or suggestion. I mean, does it ever go away? Does it ever stop hurting? No matter how confident I feel in the way I look and who I am, it doesn't feel like much in his eyes after knowing he wanted someone else and has been with someone else. :/