Do you agree with this?

Question

I know in the Glow community we all see the role of being a parent differently and all have different ideas of what good parenting is. So, what are your opinions on this post? Personally, I agree. But the comments on the post were... less than great. Lol.

Answer

I completely agree 100%

Answer

I think that whomever wrote this was pretentious and obnoxious and should really focus on their own parenting rather than tell others what they should and shouldn't be doing. But that's my opinion. It didn't offend me. I just find posts like that unnecessary.

Answer

I don't know how I'd know another mother's situation in order to judge her unless I knew her personally. Otherwise, I'd be judging people in the grocery store check out line and online.

And I don't do that because I know how horrible it is to me judged by a random person in that situation. Seriously, all my nice 'me' things were either hand-me-downs, super clearance & thrift store, or gifts from Christmas or my birthday. You won't see that my husband was almost finished with his doctorate while having an already lucrative career when he was told he needed brain surgery that would keep him alive, but cause cognitive dysfunction and early onset dementia. You wouldn't see my 16 y/o is developmentally delayed and needs so much time, the business I worked so hard to build had to be shut down because I was at school with him every day for an entire year and I had to move mountains to get him the help he needs. You wouldn't know my mother on law slipped me a $20 just so I could get my haircut for the first time in a year (or that I'll donate 10" of it to Locks of Love) You wouldn't know the miracles I work with our family budget so my kid doesn't ever go without.

Yes, there are people who take advantage of help. Always have, always will be. But for every one of those people, there are a 100 people who were dealt pretty shitty hands in life and need help, not judgement from strangers.

Answer

Do I think people should put their kids first? Always. But do I understand that a cigarette can be the one thing to get a struggling parent through the day? Yes. I don't know what parent would buy cigarettes and let their children downright starve, but I can comprehend them buying a pack of cigarettes  even if the food budget is low.

Answer

Yes absolutely. 
If you can afford to take care of your baby AND spoil yourself then you go ahead and do just that! Parents need to be pampered sometimes, too. But if it comes down to you or your baby going without, you should always choose to take care of the baby first. End of story.

Answer

I think it's really easy to tell people what they need to do with their lives when you have no idea the complexity of their life.

Answer

This post is obnoxious. Becoming a parent doesn't mean you can't do anything for yourself, have no joys and look like shit all the time. You're allowed to get your nails done. You're allowed to buy a bottle of wine or a beer. You're allowe to buy a pack of cigarettes. Now when those things interfere with the things your child needs, then it's time to cut back. But you should never neglect yourself as a parent. I still get my nails and eyebrows done, I still go shopping every once in a while and my child is very well taken care of. Just bc you treat yourself doesn't mean your kids are wanting. People who make posts like this are usually the ones who bitch about their taxes going to welfare and really should just shut the fuck up and mind their own children. But of course that's their nanny's job.

Answer

Do I think that people should prioritize essentials over non-essentials, especially if they have kids relying on them? Yes.

What bugs me about stuff like this though is that it seems to run with the assumption/stereotype that the reason why people are poor or struggling is because they are always being alcohol, cigarettes, and getting the hair/nails done over essentials. It also gives some implication that simply "putting those things back" is a solution to their financial problems. You can't even have a conversation about welfare, WIC, food stamps, or low income individuals in general without these points being inserted into the conversation.

Answer

I agree it takes sacrifice to make sure your baby has what it NEEDS versus what a parent WANTS.

I also think people deserve to feel human every now and again. But if I had to give up my $65 brazilians so my kid could have something, it would be out of the window.

Answer

I completely agree with this. But the thought process is usually 'can't afford to feed your kids? Keep buying those smokes and beer and Apply for WIC/Welfare/Foodstamps.' No one wants to sacrifice non essential and luxuries. I got eaten alive for suggesting that on another thread.

Do you agree with this?

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