Honestly, I had anonymously made a topic about feeling hopeless and suicidal. I went with what the comments said and checked myself into the hospital. They released me today and set me up with a therapist and "dbt sessions". I hate these things because I feel like there is an automatic "you're crazy" bias. Every therapist I explain how xanx is the only thing that has helped, they look at me like I'm a drug dealer. I say how my ex has driven by my house revving his engine screaming "you're a dead bitch" and how he got his friend to press b.s. Charges on me, they ask "is he REALLY doing that?" and for the court case "is there some truth to it?" 😒. Plus a huge list of everything else stressing me out to the point I don't wanna live anymore. It doesn't help NO ONE knows what PMDD is, and I overheard two nurses discussing me and one nurse asked "what is that", and she explained PMDD and the nurse who asked said "oh, who doesn't have that?". 😒. Seriously, if you are in the medical field and don't have a 100% empathetic passion for that industry--- get out. You don't know how many lives in what kind of ways you're toying with. I've probably already lost my job, but luckily I'm getting a decent tax return and a mini-semester financial aid returned that surprised me, so hopefully it's a sign that it's okay if I lose the job that was negatively impacting my mental health anyways. I'm not looking for praise, I'm hoping someone out there who saw my anonymous post, or this one, can seek out the help they need as well.