Need support

I understand most women are here to get pregnet as am I ! Let me start off as please don't judge me you don't know my problems! I have been having trouble conceiving since 16 I have pcos I got married at the age of 22 young # I am still married and in love ! I slept with a man and told my husband about it he forgave me then I found out I was 5 weeks 3 days pregnet I NEVER HAVE BEEN SO HAPPY I thought my life was going to change for the best then relized the baby wouldn't have been my husband's I am also on a script called soma for my back pain and they a baby had a high risk of dis formed so I had a abortion my husband was there the whole time and supported me now my husband wants to wait until summer to start trying i was to start now ! Any input on anything thank you ladies