To make a long story short, after this guy held my head down to cum in my mouth with no warning i stopped talking to him for a few weeks, and when he kept asking me to hang out i told him clearly, i do not want to hook up, that's not what i'm looking for. he said he understood, whatever. i didn't buy it but i brushed it off. a couple weeks later i ask him to take me to pick up some drinks, and somehow he took this as a bargain deal because only after i'd had my drinks he came onto me and fucked me. all while in his car. should i feel at fault? at the time i did not resist, mind the alcohol, and afterwards i felt disgusting. i still do. did i really bring it upon myself? i KNOW, i should have said no, pushed him away, left. but i don't know what it was, some part of me felt turned on, the drunk part of me perhaps, and yet his tounge all over my neck and his hands on me felt awful and uncomfortable and i don't know if i even get to feel this way since i was into the sex even for a moment.