Sex, Hymen Breaking, etc

Hey guys!  So I discovered for the past little while that I wasn't ready to have sex, and I'd accepted that.  But tonight felt different, I felt ready and there was so second thoughts going though my mind at all...the problem was I couldn't do, it hurt soooo much I just couldn't.  My boyfriend and I did some stuff before too to get ready for it, but not to much so maybe that's it?  Does anyone know what could possibly be going on?  Also I'm pretty sure in the little that we did do my hymen broke and there was quite a bit of blood, does that last a long time or??  Thanks for anyone who takes the time to read and help 😊💕