HELP!!! PLEASE!!!

Ok, so when I was 16, I was talking to this 27 year old guy( not a creep, a family friend's son) the son has known me since I was a baby, he was more like a brother to me than anything. Anyways we were talking on the phone one day and I was reminding him from when I was little and he used to spoil me ALL the time well something was said which lead me to telling him that I've had a secret crush on him( I know that sounds bad). This surprised him, but not by much as I used to kiss him on the cheek in my younger days which he remembered but we continued to talk which lead us to having a relationship( we weren't sexually active, we weren't that stupid!) We continued to talk a year after and I have to say I think I was blinded by complete IDIOT...because I had gotten to that point where I was planning out our future that we never had. (BTW: he had a 3 year old son at the time) I guess you can say I was desperate for love and attention. Well we'd had those days where we'd argue and stop talking to each other but then the next day we'd be lovey dovey again. It had gotten sooo bad with our arguments that I'd grow depressed and my friends would notice but I never wanted to leave him until things started changing he'd ignore for hours, cuss me out, make me cry which lead to me cutting. I was so messed up and I then realized that I had to STOP and that I needed to kick he's a** to the curb and I did stopped talking to him and deleted any existence of him and I did it for half a year. The problem is, now I can't seem to get him off my mind and I'm wanting him back. I need help on what I need to do to stop this fool for taking over my mind!!!