I hate being a stay at home Mom.

I feel so guilty posting this, and have shed many tears about even thinking it. But I need to say it someone, and hopefully someone will be able to understand how I'm feeling. 
I hate being a stay at home mom. 
I LOVE being a mom. It's the stay at home part I'm struggling with. 
I've always been an over achiever. Studying, working multiple jobs, making my way up the career ladder. 
I love my son more than anything else. But I feel like I've given him all of me and I've lost my way. 
I feel awful knowing others would love to be in my position and not need to return to work yet. 
I'm an awful mother.