mother daughter bond is TRASH
I just don't get her. I never had a relationship with my mother. It was always bad, wrong, empty. And just as I thought, she comes to me and tell me she'll be going on a trip 5 days after my uncertain due date. I knew she'd never be present for the birth of my "issue" as she once called my baby, trying to be playful about it. (Due date July 25- so planning anything around that time is awful of her) I give her chance after to chance to be a great mom And still she find a way to hurt me. Smh. Never had I had a mother daughter outing (I'm 29). Never have I ever bonded with her and it felt comfortable. I just don't get her. I want to say so more but it's like for what fucking reason anymore. She's the reason I have trust issues. I always prayed that if I had a daughter (I'm having a baby girl) that I'll do better. And I always prayed that she'd be at least a better grandmother than a mother. Smh. I get so jealous of hearing about other women bonds with their mother. I don't know what that feels like. I just know to give that to my daughter. Other than my boyfriend being in the room, I'll be pushing by myself, like I always thought. Smh. Writing this is making me cry. Smh 😔
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