The "Perfect Orgasm"

Soo I've been trying to have the perfect orgasm since I lost my virginity. Which makes me question if there even is a such thing as the perfect orgasm. I've tried different sex partners, playing with my clit while sex, I even bought a veiny dildo(which I rarely use because I don't want my pussy to smell or taste like that rubber dildo smell)but nothing amounts to masturbation alone lol which then makes me think sex orgasms and masturbation orgasms feel totally different. And idek the last time I've tried oral smh but I've never came off head anyway. The one time I was close to reaching this "perfect orgasm" I was stopped because he switched the position. He wanted me to "hold it". It was happening so fast, then he made me lose my mojo. And I'm starting to wonder if I was about to reach this orgasm because I was on top (which I rarely do) handling the situation myself. Ive had my legs shake but it didn't feel like I was cumming. And I've faked orgasms because of my patience smh should I try the same sex? Some tribbing/scissoring maybe? I need some opinions, answers, or something cause tired of this shit lol