Baby fever, baby fever, baby fever

Ladies, I need help. This is gonna be a long vent btw so please just bare with me. I'm 21. I'm approaching my senior year in college. I have an amazing boyfriend of 3 years. And I want a baby SO badly 😞 I've wanted a child ever since I was about 18, and not because they're so cute and cuddly, but because I'm not sure, but I honestly feel like God has appointed my main role in life to be a mother or a "motherly figure". I long to watch and raise a child grow up, to teach them how to always follow their own aspirations & etc. I know there are hardships, hardships that I will never understand until I am a mother myself. I know it isn't easy being a mother, at all and that is not my expectation. I want to take on that full responsibility and do all that I do for my own offspring. I want to struggle just to insure that my child has all that they need. I know I sound very stupid right now saying that "I want to struggle" and I know all of the mothers will confirm this for me but I'm saying like, I want to feel that feeling of doing whatever it takes to make someone happy. It's very difficult for me to explain why I really want a child right now but ladies, I know how I feel. And I want a baby so bad right now. From the morning sickness to staying at 3AM to struggling to pay rent, to having mental breakdowns because my child won't stop crying, I WANT IT ALL. I know I sound young and naive, I know this. But I'm tryna tell y'all, there's something inside of me that makes me feel like facing hardships for my child is what I was born to do. Financially, I don't have much money at all! I don't even have  a car because I just got in a wreck, my boyfriend only has a part time job, and he lives with my parents and I. My situation is so so so so far from ideal. It'd be selfish for me to bring a child into this world knowing my situation, but idk what to do ladies because I don't know how to make this feeling go away. Like I said, I'm only 21, I want to want to travel the world with my boyfriend and graduate college & start my career but that's not what my heart wants right now. There's only one thing that I truly want in life right now and I can't have that because financially, my life sucks. I dream about my children and it all feels so surreal. I honestly feel as if I'm already connected to them and that it's just a matter of time before I finally get to me the person that I've been longing for forever. But ladies, I know I probably sound really stupid saying I want a baby at 21 right when I'm about to graduate college but I don't know how to make this feeling go away 😞