First baby....didn't realise I had such gender preference until I found out

Found out today that it's a boy. I'm so grateful for this pregnancy, and that he's safe and well and healthy. But I feel a bit weird about it. As if, say, I was expecting a present (call it a sweater) and secretly had my eye on one, but when I tore the wrapping paper off it was something else entirely. And now I'm trying that sweater on and looking at it from all angles trying to convince myself it's what I want. I know of gender disappointment but I wouldn't go as far as saying I feel that way. I'm not sad, don't feel like crying just....a bit weirded out. Any advice??