Still going strong??

Question

I was wondering if they're any couples out there that have either cheated or been cheated on and have worked through it and are still together today?! Is it possible to move on? Do things ever go back to how they were? Do you or is it thrown in the others face? Just how do you make it still work after it? Obviously cheating is wrong and most people probably would just go else where I don't need those comments I need to know if it's possible to save a relationship you don't want to lose! 
I really hope some people actually offer input I could really use the help and someone to vent to! Many and many thanks in advance!

Answer

My SO had an affair for 6 months, last month was a year from when I found out. I was pregnant with our 3rd child at the time. I'm not going to lie there hasn't been a day that I don't think about it. It still breaks my heart and brings me down. But all in all we're doing really well. My advice to you is to talk to him about it get some sort of closure. Don't put it on the back burner otherwise it will kill you from the inside out. Don't ever think for a second it was your fault. We expanded our communication we were both really bad about keeping things in. We're working on buying our first house together and we're more in love than we were a year ago. Things do get better it takes time, it's definitely a grieving process a looonnngggg grieving process with all sorts of fucked up emotions. Don't be afraid to ask him for reassurance that helps out big time. I still do, and if he's still in love with you he won't hesitate to give you what you need. If he's not showing it tell him, don't hide your feelings is what I'm trying to get at. Good luck I hope things turn out the way you want

Answer

It is possible. It's a lot of work, but I'll give you my best advice. 
If you choose to forgive then you need to actually forgive. Don't throw it the person's face constantly or use it as a weapon in arguments. 
Forgiveness is NOT a feeling. It is a choice that takes time to manifest into actual feelings. 
Be very open about what you need and expect from the other person going forward. 
Talk about your relationship honestly. 
The sting goes away eventually, but give yourself time. It could take a while. 
Marriage is something worth fighting for if both parties are willing. Things can be better than they were before. For me, my so cheating ended up opening a whole world of insight into the good and bad of our relationship and gave us an opportunity to fix all of it. 
That's just my experience. I hope it helps you make the decision that is right for you.

Answer

I dont think it can go back to how it was because deep down you will akways be worried .. You cant have trust which is a very imortant thing in a relationship to feel safe and secure . even being lied to sucks.. My fiance lied to me and i still am having a hard time dealing with it. If he cheated id leave because this is hard idk how i could ever get past cheating. I mean i did in highschool .. But that was highschool. Lol those were different relationships. As we grow older mosr people want a good stable faithful sturdy relationship. But hey if you think u can get past it maybe try couples  counseling ? Everyone is different.

Answer

I've never been through it but my aunt and uncle were together since high school, he cheated on her a couple times, then they kind of pulled back from everyone (social media and just didn't talk about their personal relationship to anyone really) and focused on rebuilding themselves. It worked great for them, they ended up getting married without anyone knowing for 5 years and during that time truely invested all of their time in each other and learning to trust again.

Answer

I caught my husband attempting to cheat. He was reaching out to other people through Craigslist to try and hook up, and nobody ever answered him. I know this because I found the emails and went through all inboxes/outboxes/trash everything. I found this over a week ago, he's confessed to 10x and nothing coming from it. But the intent was there. I'm not sure how this will end, but for now we're still living together, mainly because we both signed a new lease a few months ago

Answer

I hope this helps,

I've been married for about 8 months and my husband has never cheated on me neither have I cheated on him but I've been cheated on in the past and I've done so as well.
Curiously the reason why many of those relationships ended had nothing to do with the cheating part.
These are some points that I think someone need to consider in a situation like this(ps; im not a therapist or anything like that this is just my opinion)
-okay so the person apologized and you decide to forgive. GOOD. Now, you need to make sure that that you're not only going to forgive, and that your are also going to MOVE ON... Seriously there's no point in "forgiving" someone if you're going to bring the "incident" up again every time you have some sort of argument, that's just unnecessary, toxic and you guys are just going to grow ti resent each other.
- the trust part. This is a very complex one right here, because is not only about the fact that you obviously lost trust on your SO but also how is that person going to handle and react to your trust issues after you forgive them. It requires a lot of commitment from both of you and a lot of work to try to rebuild that trust. I mean; are you going to be on top of him every time he goes out, when he's on his phone, etc etc. Is he going to get mad at you and tell you you're being crazy? Overall, this is a long, honest conversation you guys need to have about trust. 
-the reasoning. So while i honestly believe that not everyone that cheats has a reson to di so, in most cases there is usually something behind it. In most cases they're stuff that could've been talked about in the past, you know; stuff like insecurities, dissatisfaction in any way, monotony etc etc. Again, some people just for the sake of it, but this is something you definitely need to include on your talk, and probably out of this you would like to make some changes on your relationship.

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