I am 23 an in college going for a science degree/ engineering. This is my 2nd time being pregnant the first I was 19 and pressured into abortion. I was so afraid to tell my mom I come from a strict home and no father. 2nd time different guy and about a week ago I terminated. I think I suffer from depression during pregnancy or maybe it was the impact of my partner. Anyway I'm so distrot because I was planning to keep this baby. My partner at the time hit me when I was 5 weeks and I've just been dealing with his abuse of calling me a prostitute and a whore etc. my best friend was on the site SA so that's what he assumed about both of us. I told him I was curious so yeah I looked we weren't together then but it wasn't my thing and I just never got on or saw anyone. A year later here we are I'm 8 weeks. He started saying the baby wasn't his he wants nothing to do with me take care of it as in abortion. He's an attorney so he would threaten me legally as well . I was the only one that wanted my baby . A close friend talked me into keeping it. The dad wasn't involved and I really had no support I went to the abortion clinic to at least get an ultrasound done but didn't even make it through counseling because I was crying so hard. This pregnancy was the toughest for me I was sick to the point I couldn't even hold down water . I dealt I tried to take walks etc. my partner got mad because I pretty much told him and everyone presssuring abortion around me it wasn't happening. He emailed my mom called my grandmother uncle told her I was a prostitiute no job fake taxes ect mention my friend at this point I'm 11 weeks stressing out to the point I had bleeding and cramping and I would cry almost everyday I was so alone. Well my best friend came to visit me last week who also thought I should get an abortion and I was now approaching 15 weeks she told me I had a rape baby I would never get the happily ever after I wanted with my partner. I started caving in and told her I needed help telling my mom because I wanted to keep it . She pretty much ignored it and gave me every reason not keep my baby while putting me down. I had reached out to my partners family which went well but my partner and I had a fight after that well my friend moved my appt up so she can take me I was not sure once again about my descion but just felt so torn and exhausted. I was further along so they had to dilate my cervix I was in pain and my friend was mia and late picking me up from my appointment I was sedated . I woke up to find she had been out on dates all day and at a pool party and my dog was using the bathroom in the house I called her and she was  snapping at me so I hung up we got in a fight over the leash because she came and tried to snatch it and treat me poorly. When I was walking away she kicked me in my back and we ended up fighting. Crazy thing is though I was still recovering from sedation and she calls my mom and is saying I'm a hoe not her I beat her up . My mom is mad and thinks all this is true  I was coming back to talk with her about keeping it since I was so scared my friend came and did the total opposite and told her I had an abortion. My mom thinks I'm trying to hide it from her but I needed her help. All she's done is tell me to get my life together and believe everyone but me which is why I didn't want to reach out in the first place. Now I canceled going to see her and I don't want to really talk or open up to her at all because even though her tone has changed ...emotionally I'm in no place to be scolded. My partner came to check on me out of the whole 4months and spent the week with me which was nice but he's acting like we are just going to start back up having sex right away and like everything is ok . Any advice on this?