Should my son see his dad?

Question

Okay sorry if this is in the wrong bit but I'm after some advice. Me and my sons dad split about 3 years ago, he lives 200 miles away and sees him about 2/3 times a year, he goes weeks and weeks without contact and then gets back in touch, my son loves his dad and often talks about him but life with his dad was not the best. He was violent to me, never worked and we never had any money. Since leaving my Ex I've been with my boyfriend two years or over and he is an amazing stepdad to my son, we both work Monday to Friday, have two cars and have nice things in life and my son has a happy and loving home. Now the problem my sons dad wants him for 5 days at his house (200 miles away) and I'm really struggling to decide whether to let him or not. He hasn't seen him for over a year I never wanted to stop my son seeing his dad but at the same time I don't want him getting hurt and if he does see his dad it could be months before he bothers to get in touch again, sorry for the long one 😕

Answer

Personally I think it's time to take him to court just incase he tries not to bring him back. All of a sudden he wants baby boy for 5 days🤔 or 5 years🤔. Idk if I were you I would think ahead of time and take him to court so you have full custody and he can still have his son but he can't take him out the country and he must bring your son back. A parent haves every right to take their child where ever with them and never bring the child back if they don't want to. I'm not trying to scare you but it's a huge eye opener. One of my close friends let her daughter see her dad and he just up and left with the baby and got a girlfriend to "play mommy".

Answer

I agree with other person about going to court establish custody prior to him having a visit that long and that far away. I also have a friend who let her daughter visit her dad in another state and well that dad then went and filed for full custody in the town he lived in after the little girl was in his possession. he ended up winning full custody by telling the courts the mom had been keeping him from her and a bunch of stuff that was untrue but since he had her in his custody when he filed and he filed first he ended up winning and now my friend hardly ever gets to see her daughter cuz he keeps her from her. its just better to be safe.

Answer

I understand and I have never stopped him from seeing him but my problem is he goes weeks without a phone call, he hasn't seen him for a year, he had no birthday or Christmas present from him. My sons seven by the way so is at that age where he will ask why doesn't daddy come and see me, or why doesn't daddy ring me. I have never been spiteful to my ex and stopped contact but I feel like my son is being picked up and used whenever his dad can be bothered x

Answer

i think it's best if your son gets to know his dad and has an "equal" relationship with both parents. it's important to your son that he gets the opportunity to see his dad once in a while because if he doesn't, it could later on cause stress and depression. i know from experience. good luck!

Should my son see his dad?

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