I'm so confused 😭😭💔

It's me again from last night (im fuming and i dont know what to do posts) because I have nobody else so turn to.

Once he got home we talked about it and I sort of almost settled down a bit. Then this morning he rolls over and tells me he kissed her! After last night me asking him to tell me everything he lied again.

Before I was set on a second chance but now I'm so hurt it feels like it might be over. But hes been my only person, best friend and my everything for 4 years and I just dont even fancy or feel attracted to anyone else this whole time. I can't imagine life without him at this point but I also just can't even look at him.

Im so confused and again just dont know what to do. I know most if not all responses I get are going to tell me to leave him but I dont know if I can. Firstly he has nowhere to go as his family live miles away and his job his here. I can't just throw him out.

I cant believe he has hurt me like this. And I dont know where to turn. I can't go to my mum because if I stay with him my family will hate him.

I feel so alone right now. And for the past month or so we have been the happiest we have been in a long time, then he goes and does this and ive gone from fully in live to completely heartbroken in hours.

Hes only had a couple hours sleep but so have I ad instead of trying to make me feel better he is just sleeping.