Trying to find that thing again...

Not sure where to begin but I need some advice..

I have a pretty.. decent sexual past and thought I was good. then I met my husband who, to say, threw me off ... it's an understatement. Like. He plays this super cute shy super nerd in the light but this kid could write his own porn and make millions! That being said, I'm completely intimidated and not sure how to fix it. Anything, any advice would be great! Aside from re watching/re reading 50 shades I'm at a loss