S.O Advice. Can I leave him?

Question

Hey mamas, 
I would love some input on my situation with my boyfriend. 
I am almost 10weeks pregnant. Boyfriend and I have been together for about a year and a half, but it's difficult. He lives 2 hours away and lives with his controlling and manipulative mother (he is 32 and I am 27)
He was devastated when we found out I'm pregnant and wanted me to get an abortion. Out of the question. 
Anyways, he isn't stepping up. He doesnt have a job and his mother is justifying that by saying he helps her with her business ( she doesnt have a business) 
Long story short...I am not happy with how he is not stepping up to the plate. I know it's important for a baby to have a father figure, but I can not stand him being around. 
What can I do to protect myself and my baby to gain full custody of this baby? I can't see myself with him anymore.
Ps: I have a village of support, family, friends, coworkers, who will play roles in this baby's life.

Answer

If he is not stepping up nor caring about the baby, you do not have to allow him to be in the room when giving birth. You don’t have to put him on the birth certificate. Then legally, the baby would have no biological father. Thus, saving thousands on custody battles with the courts 😊

Answer

I was in almost an identical situation... in the end my guy stepped up to the plate. At 10 weeks the baby is still a very abstract concept to him. It wasn't until the gender reveal that he came to a scan and it started to become real. I'm now 32 weeks and we live together now and our relationship is better than it's ever been... not perfect but worlds better, and constantly improving with time. 
I think living with their moms puts them in a a bit of a shell. It's unhealthy at that age. I know how hard it is to really need emotional support from your SO and they're just being immature. 
My advice is, before you completely cut him off, really try to make him come to some of the ultrasound appointments. Get him involved in buying some fun stuff for baby like cute clothes. Ask him about names and stuff. Tell him about how much the baby is going to love him and look up to him (despite him being slightly pathetic haha). Give it at least until the gender reveal to see if he starts to feel inspired to make some life changes. 
If he doesn't change at all by the time the baby is here, simply tell him he's unsuitable to be a father and that someone else will be filling that role. You gave him all the chances. Men can surprise you, as mine did, so don't completely give up just yet. Get his mom involved too if you can bare it, sometimes seeing their mothers become excited over it helps them. Keep us updated.

Answer

do like anybody would...leave him ..take him to court... get custody trail... child support will be in order (his ass will need to get a job and stop mooching of momma ) stop feeling sorry for this guy he isn't stepping up to his responsibility bcuz he is a momma's boy...😑😕 at 37 years of age. ughhhh gross. sorry but that right there is a deal breaker and a naggy mother on all of that is bleh. she might be controlling and shit but her 37 year old son let's her... he isn't a man he is a boy who will never leave home. pathetic please run ...

Answer

If you withhold the father off the birth cert and take him to court, he can demand a paternity test to prove he is the father - Which means he can then ask for access and stuff as well. 
Personally; I think you should break up with h if you've communicated your concerns but to withhold him rights as a father and try to take him for cash?? Thats tacky imo. 
If you want your child to have a father figure then give the father a chance to be a father instead of cutting him out.
Im sad to see women pushing other women to take men for everything and take custody of their kids away. He doesn't need a job to be an attentive father, my husband doesnt work and neither do I (we are both students), and our son is the joy of everyone who meets him, but you do you. Good luck with it!

Answer

It's not worth the stress. Best to leave him :(

Answer

In Tennessee where I am from, if you are not married at the time of birth, full custody is given to mother. The only way shared custody happens if not married is after a DNA test is done to determine paternal rights. 
I was about 8 weeks when I left my soon to be babies father, because I also can't stand to be around him. I'm good with co parenting for my babies sake. He will be a fine father but I can't stand him as far as a relationship going. He gets on my nerves so bad up my butt and very needy. I'm going on 29 I don't need that, we're grown. So instead of trying to "make it work" simply because we have a child and end up hating each other and the child feeling that negativity and tension, we will coparent.

Answer

Leave! Don't let a man like that in your baby's life. Only let you be on the birth certificate

S.O Advice. Can I leave him?

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